Frequently Asked Questions

Ok, as much as I hate to say this… you maybe, sometimes, might want to.

Let me be clear: I’m not saying you have to, but there are a number of reasons you may have a vested interest in communicating with someone difficult: family ties, money, proximity, shared history. In these cases, our goal isn’t to change someone else, but to increase honesty, understanding and to set limits and boundaries.

That might sound like:

“Hey, just so you know, I can’t be around you if you’re going to treat me that way.”

“I love you and want you in my life, but if you speak to me like that I won’t be able to stay in the conversation.”

“We clearly have very different beliefs about this. I’m not interested in debating it, so when we’re together let’s just not go there.”

Sometimes change isn’t possible or even fair to ask for. But a hard conversation can still create guardrails so a relationship can continue, even if it isn’t the one you’d hoped for.

I’ve been a board-certified clinical counselor for over 10 years, and I’ve been to both individual and couples therapy myself. Therapy is an incredible tool, but this work is different. 

By law and definition, psychotherapy and counseling are medical services designed to diagnose and treat mental health conditions. The goal is typically to identify symptoms and work toward relief, healing, or long-term management. This work isn’t focused on diagnosis or treatment. It’s focused on communication, skill-building, and real-time relational engagement. 

Together we focus on things like:

• How you communicate under pressure

• How to say what you mean clearly and compassionately

• How to stay grounded when emotions run high

• How to navigate difficult conversations in real time

• How to develop your authentic relational and conversational style.

Therapy often explores why things are hard. This work focuses on how to move through them and get to a greater level of clarity.

No! At least I hope not. Having hard conversations means telling people who you are, what you're feeling and what you need. Most of the time this will lead to connection and clarity, not conflict. Conflict can still happen (it’s a normal part of life and relationships), but the goal is to choose engagement over avoidance. It’s deciding that being honest, vulnerable, and understood matters more than keeping the peace at all costs. 

You can read a book! And you should. Did you know that almost nobody reads anymore? It's a problem. Here are some of my favorites (buy them from your local bookstore, not the giant companies ruining our lives):

• The Power of Discord

• Conflict Is Not Abuse

• The Courage to be Disliked

• TALK

That being said, reading about hard conversations isn’t the same as having them. Our sessions involve scripting, role-play, feedback, and real-time practice. It’s interactive, relational work.

You hire an accountant to do your taxes. You hire a personal trainer to reach your fitness goals. You work with me to have the conversations that shape your relationships with the people who matter most to you.

AI is bad and it is harming our lives and relationships in a catastrophic way. The core issue for most folks is that they are uncomfortable and avoidant of hard conversations and conflict with real people in their real lives. Talking to AI exacerbates this problem by allowing you to simulate aspects of a relationship with a mechanism that is designed to give you quick answers that you are pleased with. In our work you will be challenged, feel uncomfortable and have to navigate a relationship with a real person (me) and not a software platform. Real learning happens in real time with real people not an artificial form of “intelligence”.

Not always. The conversations are hard because they are vulnerable and involve some risk but the subject matter doesn’t have to be negative. For example you may be wanting to tell someone you have deep feelings or love for them, or maybe that you want them to move in with you. The subject matter doesn’t have to be hard for the conversation to feel hard.